No is not a Negative
Guest post by Emily Weesner
Welcome to week 1 of our June series, Raising My Girl: A Mom's Perspective. I am tickled pink to have Emily as a guest writer today. Emily is a mom of two daughters who offers an honest perspective we can totally relate to! I know you will be blessed by her words today.
As a mom, I can't count the times I have told my children "No." Jordyn, my youngest at the sweet age of 6, has probably heard it the most. She is my daughter that must try something once before she decides if it is good for her or not. I would tell her "no" before she raced across a hot pavement and explain to her it was hot. About 30 seconds later the shoes would come off and I would watch as she tested this theory for herself.
In a house with two daughters we have an endless supply of fingernail polish and lipstick. Many times I have gotten the question from Jordyn, "can I paint this or that with my fingernail polish?"
"No my love, the polish is only for our fingernails and toenails."
Sometimes the temptation of just how pretty those lips would be with hot pink nail polish is just too consuming and she gives it a whirl, only to find out it doesn't wipe off.
Kennedy on the other hand, my 10 year old, I believe was born obedient. When she was 2 months old, we were at a well check appointment with her pediatrician asking if something was wrong with her tear ducts because she never cried. The answer, "you are meeting all of her needs, she doesn't need to cry."
As she has grown from that sweet little baby into a beautiful young lady, she has often told me, "I have a really hard time making bad choices mom,” or, “I can't be mean mom." Her reasoning, "It just isn't in me. It makes me feel bad." She has heard the word “No,” she just didn't need to test the waters to see if “No” really was the best fit.
I find myself struggling less with the word "No" as I grow. In a world that is saying "Yes" all around us, I have realized that "No" in fact is not a negative. I have lived a life much like my 6 year old. I was told "No" and yet had to test the water just to make sure. It led me down a path of broken relationships, financial struggles, depression, and ultimately losing my identity. I was saying "Yes" to my flesh and "No" to what God was telling me.
Interesting enough, if you were on the outside of my house looking in, you would see a woman with a smile and a beautiful family living a dream life. I was broken inside, empty, and pride wouldn't let me see that I alone had made the choices to be disobedient. It would have been far easier and much less painful to blame someone else for my poor choices in life, but God can't change us, I mean really change us, if we are too busy pointing fingers.
One of my favorite scriptures is the one I have tattooed not only on my heart but also on my forehead (not literally).
“Search me, O God, and know my heart: test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.” Psalm 139:23-24
I have walked the line of disobedience far too many times in life, and God being a loving Father has allowed me to fall. He told me "No" and I didn't listen, and the hot pavement burned my feet. He didn't stop there though, just as I don't with Jordyn. He lovingly picked me up, wiped my tears, and kept holding my hand while teaching me.
What I have learned along the way is God's "No's" are set in place to guide me to the life He has planned for me - a life without shame, regret or guilt. A life without broken relationships, financial ruin or depression. I rest in his "No's" because it is then I can say "Yes" to what He has for me. When you have God meeting your every need, there is no reason to cry out in fear, for He is enough.
Emily is the mother of two beautiful daughters and is a precious role-model for the girls in her community. She works actively with Hope Haven ministry, offering hope and a brighter future to teen foster young ladies.
Linking up with inspiring writers at #raralinkup, #intentionaltuesdays, #tellhisstory, #livefree, and #dancewithjesus. Need a word of encouragement? Click on one of their buttons on the right to visit. I promise you will be blessed!